Bradley Series Lesson 4

Lesson 4 really gets down to business. It defines what the coaches role in all this really is. Sometimes it seems like the coach has even more to worry about than the mother herself with all the things they are supposed to keep track with. Occasionally I have someone say "Wow, you're just so lucky to have someone as involved as Mark is" and while I admit I am very blessed this was a decisions we both made and we both have to work together on this. On top of that, why wouldn't he be involved? This is our child and I certainly wouldn't be having one without him so he very well should be involved in my opinion.

This lesson went over some basics that the father could read and understand. It debunked 8 myths and those myths are:

• Childbirth pain is unbearable & pointless
• Childbirth drugs always work
• Childbirth drugs are safe for the mother
• Childbirth drugs are safe for baby
• Drugs are given when mother needs them most
• Pain is better if delayed
• Childbirth drug administration is painless
• It hurts very bad with drugs so be warned of how bad it would be without drugs

These got elaborated on and I believe it really helped Mark to understand some of the importance of a natural birth. On a side and more personal note, we are not choosing the Bradley Method or natural birth strictly because of health reasons. In fact that probably isn't the main reason because I believe even with medical intervention plenty of babies are born "healthy enough" and "happy enough" but some of the health reasons are a plus.

After explaining in clear cut male language why natural is better the lesson continues on why it is important to have the coach and things they can say throughout the process to help keep the mother motivated and encouraged. I'll give you a few examples.

First Stage Labor:
"Each contraction brings us closer to 'Eli'."
"The stronger the contraction, the more you are dialating"
"You're doing awesome!"
"You look amazing!"

Second Stage Labor:
"Completely relax between contractions and recoup your energy."
"I love you and our baby!"
"'Eli' is almost here."

Do I see my hubby saying all those things....eh...maybe not, but I will choose some of the quotes I really think would help me in a time of extreme pain and despair and try to brush him up on them as we get closer to time. We will also have our handy workbook with us. I would also like to point out that I am not niave and relize that all this could go flying out the window and am certain at some point I won't want to hear his voice at all.

The goal for the coach or Mark will be to be enthusiastic, committed, strong, understanding, and be a relaxation expert. My goal will be to focus on relaxing through contractions and accepting Marks help. These aren't just things we pulled out of our behinds but things we actually been working towards, researching, and experimenting with for months now.

Danielle